Medieval writers had advice for almost everything—from how to sleep and travel to how to care for animals and spot trouble in everyday life. Drawn from Elizabeth Archibald’s Ask the Past: Pertinent and Impertinent Advice from Yesteryear, these 25 tips offer a quick, revealing look at the practical (and sometimes strange) guidance people recorded in the Middle Ages.
How to Adjust Your Posture
“How young maidens ought not to turn their heads thoughtlessly here and there. Daughters, don’t be like the tortoise or the crane, which turn their faces and their heads above their shoulders, winding their heads here and there like a weathervane. Instead, hold yourselves steadfast like the hare, a beast that always looks in front of him without turning his head all about. Always look directly in front of you and if you must look to the side, turn your face and your body together, holding yourself firm and sure, for those who frivolously cast their eyes about and turn their faces here and there are mocked.” — Geoffrey de la Tour Landry, The Book of the Knight of the Tower (14th century)
How to Wash Your Hair
“After leaving the bath, let her adorn her hair, and first of all let her wash it with a cleanser such as this. Take ashes of burnt vine, the chaff of barley nodes, and licorice wood (so that it may the more brightly shine), and sowbread… with this cleanser let the woman wash her head. After the washing, let her leave it to dry by itself, and her hair will be golden and shimmering… If the woman wishes to have long and black hair, take a green lizard and, having removed its head and tail, cook it in common oil. Anoint the head with this oil. It makes the hair long and black.” — Trota of Salerno, Trotula (12th century)
How to Chat with a Woman
“After greeting the lady, the man should allow a moment or two to elapse to permit the woman to speak first, should she so desire. If the woman herself starts the conversation, you will have good cause for satisfaction, assuming that you are not a fluent conversationalist, because her comment will give you plenty of topics for discussion… But if the woman delays too long before beginning to speak, you must after a short pause cleverly break into conversation. First, make some casual observation with an amusing point, or praise her native region or her family or her person.” — Andreas Capallanus, De amore (12th century)
How to Care for Your Cat
A small group of cats, and a mouse – British Library MS Harley 4751 fol. 30v
“This animal loves to be lightly stroked by human hands and is playful, especially when it is young. When it sees his own image in a mirror it plays with that and if, perchance, it should see itself from above in the water of a well, it wants to play, falls in, and drowns since it is harmed by being made very wet and dies unless it is dried out quickly. It especially likes warm places and can be kept home more easily if its ears are clipped since it cannot tolerate the night dew dripping into its ears.” — Albertus Magnus, De animalibus (13th century)
How to Soothe a Teething Baby
“Sometimes babies have trouble with teething. In that case you should squeeze the gums with your fingers, and gently massage them, and the palate as well. And you should anoint the gums with the brains of a hare (which are very suitable for this purpose), or with fat or butter or good-quality olive oil; and you should do this twice a day. The milk of a dog is suitable, too. It is also very helpful to use hen’s fat for both anointing and massaging the gums.” — Michele Savonarola, Ad mulieres ferrariense (15th century)
How to Put Out a Fire
“If a fire blazes up, it should be extinguished with sand and bran, if it blazes up further, put on sand soaked in urine.” — Mappae clavicula (12th century)
How to Pack for a Journey
“[A traveler] should carry with him two bags: one very full of patience, the other containing two hundred Venetian ducats, or at least one hundred and fifty… furthermore, he should provision himself with good Lombard cheese, sausages, tongue, and other cured meats of every sort; white biscuits, some cakes of sugar, and various confections, but not a great quantity because they spoil quickly. Above all he should take plenty of fruit syrup, because that is what keeps a man alive in extreme heat; and also ginger syrup to settle his stomach if it is upset by too much vomiting.” — Santo Brasca, Viaggio in Terrasanta (15th century)
How to Treat Baldness
“By frequently rubbing your bald spots with ground onions, you will be able to recover the charm of your head.” — Regimen Sanitatis Salernitanum (13th century)
How to Prepare a Bath
Bathing in the Codex Manesse – UBH Cod. Pal. germ. 848
“If your lord wishes to bathe and wash his body clean, hang sheets round the roof, every one full of flowers and sweet green herbs, and have five or six sponges to sit or lean upon, and see that you have one big sponge to sit upon, and a sheet over so that he may bathe there for a while, and have a sponge also for under his feet, if there be any to spare, and always be careful that the door is shut. Have a basin full of hot fresh herbs and wash his body with a soft sponge, rinse him with fair warm rose-water, and throw it over him; then let him go to bed; but see that the bed be sweet and nice; and first put on his socks and slippers that he may go near the fire and stand on his foot-sheet, wipe him dry with a clean cloth, and take him to bed to cure his troubles.” — John Russell, Boke of Nurture (15th century)
How to Cure a Headache
“Headaches you will enchant: take some earth, touch your breast three times and say: My head hurts, why does it hurt? It does not hurt.” — Pseudo-Pliny (9th century)
How to Use Bacon
“As for raw bacon which, so I hear, the Franks have a habit of eating… they are healthier than other people because of this food. Let me give a good example so that what I am writing may be believed: thick bacon, placed for a long time on all wounds, be they external or internal or caused by a blow, both cleanses any putrefaction and aids healing. Look at what power there is in raw bacon, and see how the Franks heal what doctors try to cure with drugs or with potions.” — Anthimus, De observatione ciborum (6th century)
How to Care for Your Lawn
“Nothing refreshes the sight so much as fine short grass. One must clear the space destined for a pleasure garden of all roots, and this can hardly be achieved unless the roots are dug out, the surface is levelled as much as possible, and boiling water is poured over the surface, so that the remaining roots and seeds which lie in the ground are destroyed and cannot germinate… The ground must then be covered with turves cut from good [meadow] grass, and beaten down with wooden mallets, and stamped down well with the feet until they are hardly able to be seen. Then little by little the grass pushes through like fine hair, and covers the surface like a fine cloth.” — Albertus Magnus, De vegetabilibus (13th century)
How to Dress Your Child
“Only cheap clothes should be given to little children. They smudge them with ashes, they stain them, they drool on them with their mouths, they wipe noses dripping with slime on their sleeves.” — Daniel of Beccles, Urbanus magnus (13th century)
How to Care for Your Dog
“As soon as you arrive home, be diligent that you yourself or your men ahead of you feed the dogs well, then give them fresh clean water in a basin to drink. Next have them put to bed on nice straw in a warm place, in front of the fire if they are wet or muddy… If you act this way, they will not pester people at the table or sideboard and they will not get into the beds. If you do not care for their needs well, know that when they have worked hard and are hungry, they will scrounge under the table or seize a piece of meat from the sideboard or the kitchen, and they will snap at each other and cause upsets to provide for their needs. In so doing they tire themselves and do not rest at all, and thus remain beggars and badly behaved, and this is your fault, not theirs.” — Le Menagier de Paris (14th century)
How to Cure Lovesickness
“What better helps erotic lovers so that they do not sink into excessive thoughts: temperate and fragrant wine is to be given; listening to music; conversing with dearest friends; recitation of poetry; looking at bright, sweet-smelling and fruitful gardens having clear running water; walking or amusing themselves with good-looking women or men.” — Constantinus Africanus, Viaticum (11th century)
How to Ride a Horse
Mary of Burgundy on horseback, from the Excellente Cronyke van Vlaenderen, Fol. 372v
“And if you go by horse, watch out for false steps; and if you go in the city, I remind you to go very courteously. Ride nicely, with your head a little downcast, rather than riding rampant with vulgarity; and don’t look at the heights of each house that you find; watch out that you don’t move like a man from the country; don’t slide like an eel, but go steadily on the way and among the people.” — Brunetto Latini, Il Tesoretto (13th century)
How to Tell If Someone Is or Is Not Dead
“Moreover, if there is any doubt as to whether a person is or is not dead, apply lightly roasted onion to his nostrils, and if he be alive, he will immediately scratch his nose.” — Johannes de Mirfield, Breviarium Bartholomei (14th century)
How to Dance
“It is necessary to have a refined agility and physical style. Note that this agility and style under no circumstances should be taken to extremes. Rather, maintain the mean of your movement, that is—not too much nor too little. With smoothness, appear like a gondola that is propelled by two oars through waves when the sea is calm as it normally is. The said waves rise with slowness and fall with quickness… avoid the extremes of the foreigner from the countryside and of him who is a traveling entertainer.” — Domenico da Piacenza, De arte saltandi (15th century)
How to Catch Flies
“If you have a room or a floor in your dwelling infested with flies, take little sprigs of fern, tie them together with threads like tassels, hang them up, and all the flies will settle on them in the evening. Then take down the tassels and throw them outside… otherwise, tie a linen stocking to the bottom of a pierced pot and set the pot in the place where the flies gather and smear the inside with honey, or apples, or pears. When it is full of flies, place a platter over the opening, then shake it.” — Le Menagier de Paris (14th century)
How to Give Birth
“I advise you to scream loudly, so that everyone will believe that you are in great pain, and your husband and the other members of the household will have compassion, and they will try to put out the great fire of your pain by serving you capons, candied almonds, and fine wines.” — Michele Savonarola, Ad mulieres ferrarienses (15th century)
How to Flirt with a Man
“Sometimes, as I have said, when love is not fulfilled, the fault lies with the lady; for she may love a gentleman, and yet he may not know it. Here is what she must do if such be the case. She must call his attention to herself in any number of ways: by speaking to him of some vague concern; by feigning love in obvious jest; by long, affectionate glances; or by pleasant, courteous speech. In short, by anything but a frank and open entreaty. For I shall never deem it proper that woman be the pursuer and man the pursued. And yet, she may affect all other artful guises to disclose her love. If the man is so dim-witted that he fails to perceive it, so much the worse for him.” — Richard de Fournival, Consaus d’amours (13th century)
How to Get Rid of Mosquitoes
“If a house or some other place where there are mosquitoes is fumigated with elephant dung, they are put to flight and die.” — Albertus Magnus, De animalibus (13th century)
How to Sleep
Sleeping on a bed in this 14th-century manuscript – Bibliothèque nationale de France MS Latin 6749A, fol. 18r.
“It is very good to sleep first on the right side, then on the left. No sane person should sleep on his back, for many serious illnesses result, since liquid humour, when turned from its proper course by such a position in bed, may infect brain and nerves and kidneys… At night we must avoid the moon, especially when sleeping, for it stirs cold humors and generates many kinds of catarrhs, especially if the moon’s rays, which are cold and damp, fall on the head of the sleeper.” — Bartolomeo Platina, De honesta voluptate in valetudine (1474)
How to Raise Your Child
“There should be different kinds of pictures, cloths of diverse colors, and pearls placed in front of the child, and one should use nursery songs and simple words; neither rough nor harsh words (such as those of Lombards) should be used in singing in front of the child. After the hour of speech has approached, let the child’s nurse anoint its tongue frequently with honey and butter, and this ought to be done especially when speech is delayed. One ought to talk in the child’s presence frequently and easy words ought to be said.” — Trota of Salerno, Trotula (12th century)
How to Live
“May joyful songs often gladden your soul. Cultivate pleasant words, not quarrelsome. May you often have attractive new clothes, and may you sometimes have a generous companion in bed. Avoid pillows stuffed with bran or hair, and those that are dirty. Consume platters of delicious food and undiluted wine. Don’t overindulge the appetite; scorn the glutton. Strive to be well-mannered, stay away from vices, and take care to avoid the things that are dangerous to you. If your skin is mangy, ask your doctor. Often have sweet music for your ears. Seek prosperity for yourself, be faithful, stay away from deceit. Flee envy; don’t let peevish anger seize you. When you are in holy places, cultivate sanctity. Let dirty words and shameful deeds be detestable to you. Let your actions always be forthright, never shady. Thus you will live long in splendid and happy times,” — Daniel of Beccles, Urbanus magnus (13th century)
If you enjoyed these twenty-five tips, there is plenty more where they came from. Ask the Past: Pertinent and Impertinent Advice from Yesteryear by Elizabeth P. Archibald brings together an even wider range of practical (and often hilarious) guidance from historical texts, and it’s well worth a look if you want to keep exploring advice from the Middle Ages and beyond. You can also find more curated excerpts on Archibald’s Ask the Past website.
Top Image: Bibliothèque nationale de France MS Français 254, fol. 85r.
Medieval writers had advice for almost everything—from how to sleep and travel to how to care for animals and spot trouble in everyday life. Drawn from Elizabeth Archibald’s Ask the Past: Pertinent and Impertinent Advice from Yesteryear, these 25 tips offer a quick, revealing look at the practical (and sometimes strange) guidance people recorded in the Middle Ages.
How to Adjust Your Posture
“How young maidens ought not to turn their heads thoughtlessly here and there. Daughters, don’t be like the tortoise or the crane, which turn their faces and their heads above their shoulders, winding their heads here and there like a weathervane. Instead, hold yourselves steadfast like the hare, a beast that always looks in front of him without turning his head all about. Always look directly in front of you and if you must look to the side, turn your face and your body together, holding yourself firm and sure, for those who frivolously cast their eyes about and turn their faces here and there are mocked.” — Geoffrey de la Tour Landry, The Book of the Knight of the Tower (14th century)
How to Wash Your Hair
“After leaving the bath, let her adorn her hair, and first of all let her wash it with a cleanser such as this. Take ashes of burnt vine, the chaff of barley nodes, and licorice wood (so that it may the more brightly shine), and sowbread… with this cleanser let the woman wash her head. After the washing, let her leave it to dry by itself, and her hair will be golden and shimmering… If the woman wishes to have long and black hair, take a green lizard and, having removed its head and tail, cook it in common oil. Anoint the head with this oil. It makes the hair long and black.” — Trota of Salerno, Trotula (12th century)
How to Chat with a Woman
“After greeting the lady, the man should allow a moment or two to elapse to permit the woman to speak first, should she so desire. If the woman herself starts the conversation, you will have good cause for satisfaction, assuming that you are not a fluent conversationalist, because her comment will give you plenty of topics for discussion… But if the woman delays too long before beginning to speak, you must after a short pause cleverly break into conversation. First, make some casual observation with an amusing point, or praise her native region or her family or her person.” — Andreas Capallanus, De amore (12th century)
How to Care for Your Cat
“This animal loves to be lightly stroked by human hands and is playful, especially when it is young. When it sees his own image in a mirror it plays with that and if, perchance, it should see itself from above in the water of a well, it wants to play, falls in, and drowns since it is harmed by being made very wet and dies unless it is dried out quickly. It especially likes warm places and can be kept home more easily if its ears are clipped since it cannot tolerate the night dew dripping into its ears.” — Albertus Magnus, De animalibus (13th century)
How to Soothe a Teething Baby
“Sometimes babies have trouble with teething. In that case you should squeeze the gums with your fingers, and gently massage them, and the palate as well. And you should anoint the gums with the brains of a hare (which are very suitable for this purpose), or with fat or butter or good-quality olive oil; and you should do this twice a day. The milk of a dog is suitable, too. It is also very helpful to use hen’s fat for both anointing and massaging the gums.” — Michele Savonarola, Ad mulieres ferrariense (15th century)
How to Put Out a Fire
“If a fire blazes up, it should be extinguished with sand and bran, if it blazes up further, put on sand soaked in urine.” — Mappae clavicula (12th century)
How to Pack for a Journey
“[A traveler] should carry with him two bags: one very full of patience, the other containing two hundred Venetian ducats, or at least one hundred and fifty… furthermore, he should provision himself with good Lombard cheese, sausages, tongue, and other cured meats of every sort; white biscuits, some cakes of sugar, and various confections, but not a great quantity because they spoil quickly. Above all he should take plenty of fruit syrup, because that is what keeps a man alive in extreme heat; and also ginger syrup to settle his stomach if it is upset by too much vomiting.” — Santo Brasca, Viaggio in Terrasanta (15th century)
How to Treat Baldness
“By frequently rubbing your bald spots with ground onions, you will be able to recover the charm of your head.” — Regimen Sanitatis Salernitanum (13th century)
How to Prepare a Bath
“If your lord wishes to bathe and wash his body clean, hang sheets round the roof, every one full of flowers and sweet green herbs, and have five or six sponges to sit or lean upon, and see that you have one big sponge to sit upon, and a sheet over so that he may bathe there for a while, and have a sponge also for under his feet, if there be any to spare, and always be careful that the door is shut. Have a basin full of hot fresh herbs and wash his body with a soft sponge, rinse him with fair warm rose-water, and throw it over him; then let him go to bed; but see that the bed be sweet and nice; and first put on his socks and slippers that he may go near the fire and stand on his foot-sheet, wipe him dry with a clean cloth, and take him to bed to cure his troubles.” — John Russell, Boke of Nurture (15th century)
How to Cure a Headache
“Headaches you will enchant: take some earth, touch your breast three times and say: My head hurts, why does it hurt? It does not hurt.” — Pseudo-Pliny (9th century)
How to Use Bacon
“As for raw bacon which, so I hear, the Franks have a habit of eating… they are healthier than other people because of this food. Let me give a good example so that what I am writing may be believed: thick bacon, placed for a long time on all wounds, be they external or internal or caused by a blow, both cleanses any putrefaction and aids healing. Look at what power there is in raw bacon, and see how the Franks heal what doctors try to cure with drugs or with potions.” — Anthimus, De observatione ciborum (6th century)
How to Care for Your Lawn
“Nothing refreshes the sight so much as fine short grass. One must clear the space destined for a pleasure garden of all roots, and this can hardly be achieved unless the roots are dug out, the surface is levelled as much as possible, and boiling water is poured over the surface, so that the remaining roots and seeds which lie in the ground are destroyed and cannot germinate… The ground must then be covered with turves cut from good [meadow] grass, and beaten down with wooden mallets, and stamped down well with the feet until they are hardly able to be seen. Then little by little the grass pushes through like fine hair, and covers the surface like a fine cloth.” — Albertus Magnus, De vegetabilibus (13th century)
How to Dress Your Child
“Only cheap clothes should be given to little children. They smudge them with ashes, they stain them, they drool on them with their mouths, they wipe noses dripping with slime on their sleeves.” — Daniel of Beccles, Urbanus magnus (13th century)
How to Care for Your Dog
“As soon as you arrive home, be diligent that you yourself or your men ahead of you feed the dogs well, then give them fresh clean water in a basin to drink. Next have them put to bed on nice straw in a warm place, in front of the fire if they are wet or muddy… If you act this way, they will not pester people at the table or sideboard and they will not get into the beds. If you do not care for their needs well, know that when they have worked hard and are hungry, they will scrounge under the table or seize a piece of meat from the sideboard or the kitchen, and they will snap at each other and cause upsets to provide for their needs. In so doing they tire themselves and do not rest at all, and thus remain beggars and badly behaved, and this is your fault, not theirs.” — Le Menagier de Paris (14th century)
How to Cure Lovesickness
“What better helps erotic lovers so that they do not sink into excessive thoughts: temperate and fragrant wine is to be given; listening to music; conversing with dearest friends; recitation of poetry; looking at bright, sweet-smelling and fruitful gardens having clear running water; walking or amusing themselves with good-looking women or men.” — Constantinus Africanus, Viaticum (11th century)
How to Ride a Horse
“And if you go by horse, watch out for false steps; and if you go in the city, I remind you to go very courteously. Ride nicely, with your head a little downcast, rather than riding rampant with vulgarity; and don’t look at the heights of each house that you find; watch out that you don’t move like a man from the country; don’t slide like an eel, but go steadily on the way and among the people.” — Brunetto Latini, Il Tesoretto (13th century)
How to Tell If Someone Is or Is Not Dead
“Moreover, if there is any doubt as to whether a person is or is not dead, apply lightly roasted onion to his nostrils, and if he be alive, he will immediately scratch his nose.” — Johannes de Mirfield, Breviarium Bartholomei (14th century)
How to Dance
“It is necessary to have a refined agility and physical style. Note that this agility and style under no circumstances should be taken to extremes. Rather, maintain the mean of your movement, that is—not too much nor too little. With smoothness, appear like a gondola that is propelled by two oars through waves when the sea is calm as it normally is. The said waves rise with slowness and fall with quickness… avoid the extremes of the foreigner from the countryside and of him who is a traveling entertainer.” — Domenico da Piacenza, De arte saltandi (15th century)
How to Catch Flies
“If you have a room or a floor in your dwelling infested with flies, take little sprigs of fern, tie them together with threads like tassels, hang them up, and all the flies will settle on them in the evening. Then take down the tassels and throw them outside… otherwise, tie a linen stocking to the bottom of a pierced pot and set the pot in the place where the flies gather and smear the inside with honey, or apples, or pears. When it is full of flies, place a platter over the opening, then shake it.” — Le Menagier de Paris (14th century)
How to Give Birth
“I advise you to scream loudly, so that everyone will believe that you are in great pain, and your husband and the other members of the household will have compassion, and they will try to put out the great fire of your pain by serving you capons, candied almonds, and fine wines.” — Michele Savonarola, Ad mulieres ferrarienses (15th century)
How to Flirt with a Man
“Sometimes, as I have said, when love is not fulfilled, the fault lies with the lady; for she may love a gentleman, and yet he may not know it. Here is what she must do if such be the case. She must call his attention to herself in any number of ways: by speaking to him of some vague concern; by feigning love in obvious jest; by long, affectionate glances; or by pleasant, courteous speech. In short, by anything but a frank and open entreaty. For I shall never deem it proper that woman be the pursuer and man the pursued. And yet, she may affect all other artful guises to disclose her love. If the man is so dim-witted that he fails to perceive it, so much the worse for him.” — Richard de Fournival, Consaus d’amours (13th century)
How to Get Rid of Mosquitoes
“If a house or some other place where there are mosquitoes is fumigated with elephant dung, they are put to flight and die.” — Albertus Magnus, De animalibus (13th century)
How to Sleep
“It is very good to sleep first on the right side, then on the left. No sane person should sleep on his back, for many serious illnesses result, since liquid humour, when turned from its proper course by such a position in bed, may infect brain and nerves and kidneys… At night we must avoid the moon, especially when sleeping, for it stirs cold humors and generates many kinds of catarrhs, especially if the moon’s rays, which are cold and damp, fall on the head of the sleeper.” — Bartolomeo Platina, De honesta voluptate in valetudine (1474)
How to Raise Your Child
“There should be different kinds of pictures, cloths of diverse colors, and pearls placed in front of the child, and one should use nursery songs and simple words; neither rough nor harsh words (such as those of Lombards) should be used in singing in front of the child. After the hour of speech has approached, let the child’s nurse anoint its tongue frequently with honey and butter, and this ought to be done especially when speech is delayed. One ought to talk in the child’s presence frequently and easy words ought to be said.” — Trota of Salerno, Trotula (12th century)
How to Live
“May joyful songs often gladden your soul. Cultivate pleasant words, not quarrelsome. May you often have attractive new clothes, and may you sometimes have a generous companion in bed. Avoid pillows stuffed with bran or hair, and those that are dirty. Consume platters of delicious food and undiluted wine. Don’t overindulge the appetite; scorn the glutton. Strive to be well-mannered, stay away from vices, and take care to avoid the things that are dangerous to you. If your skin is mangy, ask your doctor. Often have sweet music for your ears. Seek prosperity for yourself, be faithful, stay away from deceit. Flee envy; don’t let peevish anger seize you. When you are in holy places, cultivate sanctity. Let dirty words and shameful deeds be detestable to you. Let your actions always be forthright, never shady. Thus you will live long in splendid and happy times,” — Daniel of Beccles, Urbanus magnus (13th century)
If you enjoyed these twenty-five tips, there is plenty more where they came from. Ask the Past: Pertinent and Impertinent Advice from Yesteryear by Elizabeth P. Archibald brings together an even wider range of practical (and often hilarious) guidance from historical texts, and it’s well worth a look if you want to keep exploring advice from the Middle Ages and beyond. You can also find more curated excerpts on Archibald’s Ask the Past website.
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